Those of you who know me personally know that I have varied interests. My desire to learn and the passion I pour into interests is one of my nicest traits. However, my inability to stick with something has not always been one of my strengths. When asked if I play any instruments, I will answer with, “Yes, four…kind of five.” I can play piano, guitar, mandolin, and fiddle (and, at one point, flute, although I think that talent has completely escaped me)…but I cannot play any of them well. Particularly as a youth, I had the tendency to quit something if it were too challenging or I didn’t get good enough fast enough (despite my refusal to practice–I wanted to be magically perfect, duh!).
As an adult, I’ve been trying to commit more to my passions. I am humbly proud of myself for starting and committing to my soapmaking. It has been a wonderful experience and fills the role of my creative passion. I have deep gratitude to all of you, my friends and family, who have supported me through kind words, time, assistance, and purchases. And now, I ask for even more support.
My soapmaking is absolutely wonderful and completes my need to create. I am excited to continue on my soaping quest, however, I am even more excited to announce my next big adventure. I’ve been worried about sharing the good news openly because, yes, I’m afraid to be perceived as “flaky.” I’m aware that my interests seem to change every month or so, yet I believe that this constant change is because I’ve been searching for my ultimate role in life. As I said before, soaping fills my need to create–but it does not fill the role of my greatest passion.
I waffled in college to find an area of study that best completed me. Ultimately, I ended up double majoring in Global Development Studies and Sociology with a minor in African Studies. I loved my programs but went back and forth from focusing on community development to HIV/AIDS to maternal and infant health to gender equality. I was drawn to each aspect but something was missing. Moreover, a career in global development does not currently meld well with my love of being a work-from-home mother. I’ve been searching for a way to combine my desire to remain at home with my son with my other passion of development and public health. Who knew that I would find the solution in motherhood?
When I found out that I was pregnant and immediately committed myself to one year of breastfeeding. A year came and went and here I am now with a fifteen month old and no end to nursing in sight. For me, breastfeeding is a wonderful experience and is very fulfilling. To me, breastfeeding was what made sense from the beginning. However, I was lucky. I had very few problems with nursing and I had a support system for when questions arose. In my own community I have seen too few women even attempt breastfeeding because it is a foreign concept to them. I have seen women give up breastfeeding after only a few weeks because of a lack of information and no support system. I have watched women give up because their doctors, whom they trust to know best, don’t take the time to teach or to troubleshoot. I have personally been told by a pediatrician that she could not diagnose my possible case of thrush because her practice only “deals with the pediatric side of things” (who cares if my baby contracts thrush from me, right?).
It is because of this lack of information and lack of support for breastfeeding that I have chosen to become a lactation consultant. I have enrolled in a wonderful program, Intuitive Childbirth, which provides training at an affordable cost in exchange for doing community outreach.
My heart is a’flutter and my stomach in knots because I worry about my ability to balance my new program with all the other wonderful things that I have going on in my life. I feel passionate about this path and have taken time and care to arrive at it. I want to commit to it but I will need support. I ask for your prayers, your kind thoughts, and any other support you are willing to give to me as I take on this journey. From the bottom of my heart, I say thank you in advance.